Wed, 04 Nov 2009 03:23:02 GMT

I've basically slept 3 whole days away, but today I spent the ENTIRE day in bed. Literally. I didn't even get up to pee. I just kept forcing myself to fall back asleep. I finally tried to get up at 7:30 because Ash was coming home and I didn't want her to see me like that, so I went to the bathroom, went downstairs and had a massive binge since no-one was home, showered and purged, and then straight back to bed. (ps- I read somewhere that chugging a carbonated drink before you purge makes it a lot easier- and wow. I can't even begin to explain how much easier it made it). I fell asleep crying last night, and woke up this morning crying. I'm still crying now. I also cut again, surprise, surprise ? I am a MESS.

I asked Ashley to buy me sleeping pills and she did. When I was in 9th grade, I tried to kill myself by overdosing on sleeping pills. I'm not saying I'm going to kill myself now or anything like that, but it's still a trigger for those thoughts.

I HAVE to wake up tomorrow. I HAVE to study and get on with my life. I can't rot away like this in my bed. I have to be worth more than that.

Sun, 16 Mar 2008 03:21:39 GMT

I hope some of you guys are still around. I'm doing a project on eating disorders and I need a min. of 50 survey's completed so it would be incredible if you could help out.

Thanks again lovely's!

EATING DISORDER SURVEY

This survey is completely anonymous. All of the information given will be used solely for the purpose of a high school research project.

Type of Eating Disorder:

a. Bulimia Nervosa

b. Anorexia Nervosa

c. EDNOS

d. Other:____________________________

Is your disorder:
1. Self-diagnosed b. Doctor/Medical diagnosis

Age when disorder began:__________________________

Current Age:______________________

(Not required)

Current Weight:________________

Highest Weight:_________________

Lowest Weight:_________________

Height:____________

Are your parents:
1. Married
2. Divorced (How old were you when they divorced?:_______________)
3. Separated but not divorced
4. Never married
5. Other:____________________________________________________

Do you live with:
1. Mother and Father (in the same home)
2. Mother
3. Father
4. Mother and Father (in separate homes/ divided custody)
5. Extended family
6. Other:_____________________________________________________

Does anyone else in your family have an eating disorder or any other illnesses? If so, briefly describe:

9. Did you grow up in a environment with a parental figure or sibling dieting or someone dissatisfied with their body? Briefly describe who and to what extreme:

Do you feel that your parental figures put unnecessary or inappropriate pressures on you to achieve success?
1. Yes
2. No

Do you feel that your parents or siblings withdraw from you? (Do you feel that your parents isolate you from them or the rest of your family?)
1. Yes
2. No

Have you had any traumatic events take place during your lifetime? If so, briefly describe (i.e. death of family members or friends, abuse, drug or alcohol use, etc.)

Do you feel that you have a competitive relationship with any of your family members?
1. Yes (describe:)_______________________________________________
2. No

Were you ever teased by family about your weight (even in a joking manner)
1. Yes (describe:)

Overall, do you feel that you had a dysfunctional family life environment?
1. Yes
2. No

List gender and ages of each of your siblings:

Is there any other information that you are willing to share about your eating disorder or family environment? (i.e. development of disorder, personal opinions on the cause of the disorder, anything.)

Sat, 13 Oct 2007 04:41:39 GMT

Friends only.
Comment to be added:]

i can give you life,